Sometimes I just sit and fantasize about my future.
Actually, I lied. Let me start over.
I fantasize about my future every single day and I’ve been doing this for as long as I can remember. I remember when I was little I would submerge my head under the blankets and cover my ears to block out sound so the images in my head would become more real. I would imagine my future home, future friends, what my wife and I would look like in 20 or 80 years, what kind of cat we would have - you name it. Ever since pre-school I have been dreaming about the day I leave for college, but last year when the time came to apply for schools, this image I have been developing in my head for longer than my memory became more and more translucent. The schools I applied for didn’t excite me and my dream began to fade away, which scared me out of my wits. As of recently though, this image has been coming back and it is more vivid than ever. I can see myself in the dormitory hallway carrying a box of belongings into my room. The door is wide open, welcoming me, and inside there is nothing but a bed and one naked window allowing unobscured sunlight to illuminate the entire room by reflecting off bare white walls. I step inside and the heat generated from the sun clashes with the coolness of my skin like a long-awaited embrace. This image is so real to me now and I don’t have to shut out sound and light to see it clearly. Just thinking about it makes my heart beat faster and my eyes tear up with such overwhelming happiness. It’s difficult for me to articulate in words how I feel. I’m not exactly sure what sparked this change, but I am so thankful I can dream again.
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